It does get better

By now, most of you have probably heard of Dan Savage’s “It Gets Better” project. I did record a video for it. I offered Mary Oliver’s poem “Wild Geese” because it says what I would like to say better than I could say it. Also, because art saves lives. That’s the title of the video, and I really believe it. The kids in high school who discover art, poetry, music, drama, or some other way of being creative fare so much better.

I’ve had a few conversations with people who are skeptical of the project, skeptical of whether the message “it gets better” matters to teenagers. This person wrote a scathing review of the project, and then deleted all the comments myself and apparently hundreds of other people wrote in to her.

I think that as adults, we learn to dissociate ourselves from our teenage selves. We have to, in order to individuate and grow up. And if our teenage selves endured abuse and harassment, it’s probably survival. But it is easy to forget how much power parents and school teachers really have in our lives, and just be the act of turning 18, moving the fuck out, not having to answer to parents, etc – just that is a radical turn of events. It really does just get better, just by our lives becoming our own. And I think we forget how important that step is, once we have some distance on it. And for parents who are desparate to hold on to their control, they certainly aren’t giving that message out. Kids NEED to hear that message. It gives them hope.

Oh, and happy Coming Out Day. I wrote this entry days ago but just got around to finishing it and posting it. It seems fitting to finally post it today.

I’ve been out as bisexual since 1993. That’s 17 years. Jesus fucking christ. That’s sort of overwhelming to think about.


~ by realsupergirl on October 11, 2010.

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